It’s really hard to muster up genuine sympathy for the failing retail sector. It’s not for the want of trying.

I just went shopping, in real life.

Could have sat at home, on my sofa, ordered exactly what I needed in just a couple of minutes, and gone about my day as planned. Maybe even read a book.

Nope. Not me. Shop local! That’s the mantra.

It keeps people in jobs. It’s supposed to be better for the environment. And, in truth, I had already started the process of prepping the bone broth ingredients before I discovered my slow cooker was cracked right across the middle. In ideal circumstances I needed a replacement today, not tomorrow.

So off I popped to the shops.

Shop 1

Headed straight to the electrical area, only one small slow cooker option seemed to be on display (and not the giant version I was looking for). Asked a member of staff if they had anything larger, was promptly told that I could get something bigger online, like online is the answer to all shopping problems.

I held my tongue. It would have been too easy to have responded sarcastically and she seemed like a nice lady, so I decided to behave myself. She then suggested I try their competitor, next door.

Ten out of ten for attempting to help the customer, zero out of ten for successfully giving your hard won business away.

Shop 2

Praise the Lord! They have one, just the right size, on display. Nothing on the shelves underneath.

I wave down a team member and tell them what I want, pointing at the one on the shelf. They disappear. Another team member wanders over to see if they can help. I tell them I am already being helped. She says he’s not helping, he sent her over instead.

I repeat my requirement, pointing again at the (real life) item on display that I want. She consults the internet, and tells me she can get me one for Tuesday.

I stare, forlornly, at the slow cooker on display, shake my head and walk out £70 richer because they won’t even consider selling me what they have. It’s not in a box.

Shop 3

Finally. A slow cooker in a box! It’s only £25. It’s flung it in my trolley, along with a number of other items that this national supermarket chain sells.

It occurs to me that the modern consumer gives supermarkets a hard time for trying to be all things to all people but supermarkets, at least, seem to understand they are in the business of selling things today. Not tomorrow, not on Tuesday. Not online.

They are not primarily delivery companies with oversized flashy showrooms. They’ve got stuff on the shelves, ready for the customer to take away when they need them.

The first two shops are now, in reality, just over-sized showrooms for their online operations. They are deluding themselves that they are still in retail, they are in the delivery business, just like Amazon but with the added bonus of false promise. Amazon doesn’t have shops or pretend you can look at its goods before your order them, it just promises you’ll get it the next day.

It’s a shame because customers may be mistaken and think they can actually visit shops and buy things then take them away. Novel.

Yes, stock holding is expensive. I get it.

But buying customers then losing customers is also expensive.

Both Shops 1 & 2 spend a small fortune in marketing themselves, most of which is clearly wasted since they were my first and second choices, and neither could meet my needs and retail me something.

There’s no point being top of the mind if you’ve got nothing on the shelf.